Posted on October 31st, 2025

I never really thought much about the journey to my goal, apart from planning how I was going to study and making sure I passed my exam. Beyond that, I imagined I would get clients and then have my own business. I simplified it, I thought that was it, in a nutshell. I knew what I wanted and had my heart set on it. What I didn’t realise was that my path wouldn’t be straightforward, that I would be dealing with setbacks, self-doubt, and moments when I questioned myself.

Just having a goal and visualising it can be exciting, exhilarating, and powerful in itself. You have a plan to bring it to life, a plan that is yours alone, but reaching that goal, like healing, can be a journey. Most of the time, there is no direct path to success. In fact, it’s likely to be filled with ups and downs, making you feel as if you’re taking one step forward and two or three steps back.

For everyone, there will be different experiences to face, different scenarios and situations to contend with. The resources we have, built from our experience, knowledge, finances, relationships, time, and so on, all help us find success in reaching that goal. The same can be said for our past experiences, which impact our journeys. For better or worse, our decisions are based on previous experiences that shape how we process information, through our representational systems: the sensory modalities we use to think, remember, and process experiences — Visual (see), Auditory (hear), Kinaesthetic (feel), Olfactory (smell), and Gustatory (taste).

Taking all this into consideration, our journeys, no matter how similar or dissimilar, represent the uniqueness of each and every path toward our goals.

My journey toward my goal has certainly had its ups and downs. Then factor in depression and anxiety, which played a vital part in my experience, helping me acknowledge how much low self-worth and low self-esteem impacted me on my road to finding my life purpose.

For instance, I have always had a fear of being seen, of anyone seeing how truly vulnerable and sensitive I am, and using that against me to criticise or hurt me. I believe this stems from being bullied and wanting to shrink myself so that I wasn’t seen. Don’t get me wrong, to a certain degree, my defences were down around my friends, when I had a drink or when someone needed my help. However, I never really understood how guarded and mistrusting I was, and that I had been this way for most of my life, even with friends and family.

Taking this into consideration, when it came time to take the next step toward my goal, advertising myself and my services, I initially avoided it. Then I procrastinated. Then I told myself it had to be perfect before I could put it out there, which took even more time. If one platform didn’t work, I would start the whole procrastination cycle again on another.

In some ways, it’s like applying for jobs, trying to sell yourself to an organisation. If it doesn’t work, you go back to the drawing board, make adjustments, and start again. I remember at one point, it took me a couple of days just to answer one question on an application form. I was taking “perfect” to a new level. But at the time, I was living on autopilot, not realising how much low self-esteem and low self-worth were affecting every part of my life.

These scenarios, these personal experiences, and the resources I may or may not have had all played a part in my decision-making. Making decisions and taking steps toward my goal challenged me, forcing me to face my fears head-on.

I also began to see that when I self-sabotaged, whether through procrastination or avoidance, and didn’t understand why, it was an opportunity to become more self-aware. By analysing my emotions, talking things through, and journaling, I was able to focus on it and learn from it.

Going after what I truly wanted helped me face my fears. There have definitely been ups and downs in my journey, but I choose to take the positive out of it, because it has helped me understand myself more.

Now, I won’t say those fears are completely gone, but they no longer have the same power they once did. I just try to always remind myself that consistency is key.

Our paths are unique, and they’ll always differ from everyone else’s. The setbacks, the restarts, the lessons, they’re all part of the road that leads you to who you’re meant to be, your authentic self. Even if the path is filled with obstacles, don’t let it stop you. Consistency is key, keep going, and you will reach your destination.